Hear ye, hear ye, good citizens of Realmsdom. Welcome to Realms Faire 2014 and the Stockade Brigade, Word Wizards on Trial event.
To learn more about the Realms Faire, please visit the Realms Faire headquarters HERE.
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To cast your eyes on the amazing and stupendous Realms Faire Giveaways, go HERE.
Huzzah to our sponsors of this most entertaining event - thou canst locate them near the end of the scroll HERE.
1. The throwing of sticks or stones or anything resembling fecal matter, while amusing and entertaining, shall not be allowed during these trials.
2. Spitting upon our worthy guests or other citizens, while understandable in some circumstances, is strictly forbidden.
3. Ye witnesses for the accused shalt use ye best Olde English whilst crafting your comments. Said wordsmithing shall earn you high points with the wenches and blokes and with me, the Sheriff of Realmsdom and bestower of gifts.
4. Each prisoner shall offer a bribe, forgive me, I mean a token of their thanks to one eloquent wordsmithing witness per day.
5. As Sheriff of Realmsdom, I shall be offering a $25 Amazon gift card and one of my e-books (winner’s choice) as reward for the most eloquent wordsmithing witness of the week.
6. HENCE, ye must comment to win!
*Sheriff Mary unrolls the scroll* Here ye good people of Realmsdom. Before you stands Lady Nicole Zoltack, of the shire of Pennsylvania, currently a guest of ye olde Realmsdom Stockade Brigade, courtesy of her highness, Lady Mary Pax, and overseen by me, Lady Mary, the honorable Sheriff of Realms.
It has been brought to my attention from a certain goliath...I mean a resident of Realmsdom... that the Lady Nicole Zoltack has allowed a barbarian to run amuck and attack unsuspecting villagers. As proof, I offer you these scribblings from her own hand:
The battle turned from foolhardy to serious when her sword came within inches of
To learn more about the Realms Faire, please visit the Realms Faire headquarters HERE.
~ Joust ~ Drench-a-Wench/Soak-a-Bloke ~ Stockade Brigade ~ Dueling Bards ~ Riddle Me This ~ Phasers ~ Dragon Hunt ~ Wisdom of the Creative Realms ~
To cast your eyes on the amazing and stupendous Realms Faire Giveaways, go HERE.
Huzzah to our sponsors of this most entertaining event - thou canst locate them near the end of the scroll HERE.
Ye Olde Realms Trial Rules.
Prithee remember the rules lest ye find thyself sent to the stockade:
1. The throwing of sticks or stones or anything resembling fecal matter, while amusing and entertaining, shall not be allowed during these trials.
2. Spitting upon our worthy guests or other citizens, while understandable in some circumstances, is strictly forbidden.
3. Ye witnesses for the accused shalt use ye best Olde English whilst crafting your comments. Said wordsmithing shall earn you high points with the wenches and blokes and with me, the Sheriff of Realmsdom and bestower of gifts.
4. Each prisoner shall offer a bribe, forgive me, I mean a token of their thanks to one eloquent wordsmithing witness per day.
5. As Sheriff of Realmsdom, I shall be offering a $25 Amazon gift card and one of my e-books (winner’s choice) as reward for the most eloquent wordsmithing witness of the week.
6. HENCE, ye must comment to win!
Let the trials begin!
*Sheriff Mary unrolls the scroll* Here ye good people of Realmsdom. Before you stands Lady Nicole Zoltack, of the shire of Pennsylvania, currently a guest of ye olde Realmsdom Stockade Brigade, courtesy of her highness, Lady Mary Pax, and overseen by me, Lady Mary, the honorable Sheriff of Realms.
It has been brought to my attention from a certain goliath...I mean a resident of Realmsdom... that the Lady Nicole Zoltack has allowed a barbarian to run amuck and attack unsuspecting villagers. As proof, I offer you these scribblings from her own hand:
The battle turned from foolhardy to serious when her sword came within inches of
slicing off his ear. His eyes narrowed, and his breathing changed. Had she triggered
his Bloodlust? In the darkness of the forest, she still had not clearly glimpsed his face
yet.
His huge hand grabbed her wrist and crushed it. Still, she held on, refusing to be
His huge hand grabbed her wrist and crushed it. Still, she held on, refusing to be
unarmed.
His other hand dropped his sword and gripped her neck. He dragged her to him.
And that's when she smelled him. Beneath the scent of the stolen tunic he wore, his
His other hand dropped his sword and gripped her neck. He dragged her to him.
And that's when she smelled him. Beneath the scent of the stolen tunic he wore, his
stench rolled over her, filling her nostrils and revealing who he truly was.
Not a barbarian after all.
But a goliath.
Have ye any evidence to offer in your defense Lady Nicole?
Yes, barbarians tend to react first and think later, but can one argue against defending oneself? After all, Ivy was only defending her honor. The goliath posed as a barbarian and was watching her bathe. It would have been wrong on her part not to take up her sword against him.
What say ye, good people of Realmsdom? Shall the Lady Nicole be placed in the stockade for allowing her barbarian to run amok, or shall she be declared innocent of the charges before the Court? Cast your vote in the comments.
Not a barbarian after all.
But a goliath.
Have ye any evidence to offer in your defense Lady Nicole?
Yes, barbarians tend to react first and think later, but can one argue against defending oneself? After all, Ivy was only defending her honor. The goliath posed as a barbarian and was watching her bathe. It would have been wrong on her part not to take up her sword against him.
What say ye, good people of Realmsdom? Shall the Lady Nicole be placed in the stockade for allowing her barbarian to run amok, or shall she be declared innocent of the charges before the Court? Cast your vote in the comments.
Should you need to further investigate said crime, I suggest reading her entire account of the matter entitled BLOODLUST. If the name alone does not sway your decision I do not know what will.
A respectable battle it tis. Although the goliath has a stench, I do not smell the foul aroma of wizardry.
ReplyDeleteAh, but goliaths be a tricky sort, my Lady Mary. Mayhap he is hiding his wizardry with a spell.
DeleteWhy thank ye, Lady Mary, for you have been blessed with reason.
DeleteFree Nicole! Free Nicole! Free Nicole! Come good people of Realmsdom, clearly you all must see there is no threat of wizardry here.
ReplyDeleteClearly though and the Lady Mary see Lady Nicole's innocence, Lady HK. But do our fellow people feel the same?
DeleteHuzzah, Lady HK! May good graces heap upon you and yours.
DeleteNay, no threat of wizardry, but she is guilty of befouling the air by provoking the goliath. eeeew.
ReplyDeleteHuzzah! A second vote for freedom!
DeleteI must agree, provoking the goliath might not have been the smartest of ideas, but I thank ye for realizing I am no threat to anyone!
DeleteHuzzah and congratulations to the Lady HK, winner of a copy of BLOODLUST. Methinks the Lady HK should buy a lottery ticket as she seems to be mighty lucky these days!!
ReplyDelete