Tuesday, November 11, 2014

Stockade Brigade~2014 Realms Faire~Day Two

Welcome to the Stockade Brigade. All week, selected authors shall be put in the stockades and brought on trial for word witchery/wizardry. Witnesses shall score points by testifying for or against the author’s crimes. Points will be scored by wordsmithing with their best Olde English afore 8 o’clock in the Eastern time. An e-book from the author on trial will be given away every day to the witness who scores the most points. A pair of e-books by the Sheriff and a gift card to Amazon will be awarded at the end of the week. Warrants for their arrests have already been issued. The Sheriff of Realmsdom will catch up with them all soon.

Hear ye, hear ye, good citizens of Realmsdom. Welcome to Realms Faire 2014 and the Stockade Brigade, Word Wizards on Trial event.

To learn more about the Realms Faire, please visit the Realms Faire headquarters HERE.

To cast your eyes on the amazing and stupendous Realms Faire Giveaways, go HERE

Huzzah to our sponsors of this most entertaining event - thou canst locate them near the end of the scroll HERE.

Ye Olde Realms Trial Rules. 

Prithee remember the rules lest ye find thyself sent to the stockade:

1. The throwing of sticks or stones or anything resembling fecal matter, while amusing and entertaining, shall not be allowed during these trials.

2. Spitting upon our worthy guests or other citizens, while understandable in some circumstances, is strictly forbidden.

3. Ye witnesses for the accused shalt use ye best Olde English whilst crafting your comments. Said wordsmithing shall earn you high points with the wenches and blokes and with me, the Sheriff of Realmsdom and bestower of gifts.

4. Each prisoner shall offer a bribe, forgive me, I mean a token of their thanks to one eloquent wordsmithing witness per day.

5. As Sheriff of Realmsdom, I shall be offering a $25 Amazon gift card and one of my e-books (winner’s choice) as reward for the most eloquent wordsmithing witness of the week.

6. HENCE, ye must comment to win!

Let the trials begin!

*Sheriff Mary unrolls the scroll* Here ye good people of Realmsdom. Before you stands Lady Nicole Zoltack, of the shire of Pennsylvania, currently a guest of ye olde Realmsdom Stockade Brigade, courtesy of her highness, Lady Mary Pax, and overseen by me, Lady Mary, the honorable Sheriff of Realms.

It has been brought to my attention from a certain goliath...I mean a resident of Realmsdom... that the Lady Nicole Zoltack has allowed a barbarian to run amuck and attack unsuspecting villagers. As proof, I offer you these scribblings from her own hand:

          The battle turned from foolhardy to serious when her sword came within inches of
          slicing off his ear. His eyes narrowed, and his breathing changed. Had she triggered
          his Bloodlust? In the darkness of the forest, she still had not clearly glimpsed his face

          His huge hand grabbed her wrist and crushed it. Still, she held on, refusing to be

          His other hand dropped his sword and gripped her neck. He dragged her to him.

          And that's when she smelled him. Beneath the scent of the stolen tunic he wore, his
         stench rolled over her, filling her nostrils and revealing who he truly was.

          Not a barbarian after all.

          But a goliath.

Have ye any evidence to offer in your defense Lady Nicole?

Yes, barbarians tend to react first and think later, but can one argue against defending oneself? After all, Ivy was only defending her honor. The goliath posed as a barbarian and was watching her bathe. It would have been wrong on her part not to take up her sword against him.

What say ye, good people of Realmsdom? Shall the Lady Nicole be placed in the stockade for allowing her barbarian to run amok, or shall she be declared innocent of the charges before the Court? Cast your vote in the comments.

Should you need to further investigate said crime, I suggest reading her entire account of the matter entitled BLOODLUST. If the name alone does not sway your decision I do not know what will.


  1. A respectable battle it tis. Although the goliath has a stench, I do not smell the foul aroma of wizardry.

    1. Ah, but goliaths be a tricky sort, my Lady Mary. Mayhap he is hiding his wizardry with a spell.

    2. Why thank ye, Lady Mary, for you have been blessed with reason.

  2. Free Nicole! Free Nicole! Free Nicole! Come good people of Realmsdom, clearly you all must see there is no threat of wizardry here.

    1. Clearly though and the Lady Mary see Lady Nicole's innocence, Lady HK. But do our fellow people feel the same?

    2. Huzzah, Lady HK! May good graces heap upon you and yours.

  3. Nay, no threat of wizardry, but she is guilty of befouling the air by provoking the goliath. eeeew.

    1. Huzzah! A second vote for freedom!

    2. I must agree, provoking the goliath might not have been the smartest of ideas, but I thank ye for realizing I am no threat to anyone!

  4. Huzzah and congratulations to the Lady HK, winner of a copy of BLOODLUST. Methinks the Lady HK should buy a lottery ticket as she seems to be mighty lucky these days!!


Thanks for dropping by. I love reading comments and will respond by e-mail as soon as possible.